Today I stumbled upon a film set and offered my talents. I became a gaffer. I always saw myself as more of a leading man, but I’m happy to help any way I can. It had me yearning for the stage. It is good to have something to look forward to when I get back home.
Tonight, I part ways with Varanasi. This city goes beyond comprehension. There is something here, something intangible that takes hold of you and works you from the inside out. This is the wild west. There are no rules. You see things that you are not supposed to see. You go places that you should not go. There is nothing new to discover. It has been here. It is the past and the present at once. Gurus offer you food and ganja in their humble shack. Drunk lunatics scream at you and threaten to defile your sister. A failing marriage on public display alongside a gaunt holy man. A business minded entrepreneur and a dog unable to stand as it slowly dies from rabies. A man with no arms and a burning body. A well-respected student of Sanskrit at the famous Banaras Hindu University and a white girl from California with fetid dreadlocks. I have never been to a place that has left me feeling this way. It’s high octane and it’s quiet spirituality. There is no amount of time one could spend here to fully understand it. To fully understand this place is to live an entire life here and to die in the center of it all, to be burned with the rest and thrown into the holy water. I met a woman along the way who told me, “Varanasi is good for a day. Once you see the craziness, you get it.” I disagree. Once you see the craziness, you think you get it. You try to pack it away neatly and nicely as a crazy city where the customs are wild, spiritual, and ancient. Then you spend some more time here, and you become numbed to the craziness, and it becomes just any other hectic city. That’s where to real juice is. You zone out and take it for granted. Suddenly, you realize that glowing red orb your transfixed on, is a burning body, and that the water that’s splashing against the shore is the Ganges River, and that the massive buildings lining the coast were built before machinery, forged by hand. You remember that where you are and what you’re seeing is a way of life that has been at work for thousands of years. You don’t get Varanasi, Varanasi gets you.
I will take a train to Rishikesh at 2:00am. It’s a 16-hour journey. I’m not looking forward to it. If I don’t leave Varanasi now, I might accidentally stay for good.
So proud of you for truly embracing this experience!! Can’t wait to hear about the next place. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️